I know u r loosing so many thing but one thing for sure u didn't lose ur hope b/c u would have written this asking someone to help u So mate hold on z hope that u got cuz thats one of very important thing that will keep u alive n to keep dreaming about tomorrow Remeber When u r in ur hardest time ppl will always make it worse so u have to be strong enough to push the force that is pushing u with z same force so If u want a real change stop listen to what ppl say n lelay on God & on ur hope