Because you can always die so you dont have anything to lose..you might as well live and stuff... you're already at rock bottom what more is there to fear... this place you are at now can be a gift if you know how to use it..it strips away all the unnecessary shit..itll help you figure out what you want...I've been there but now I'm working to better myself...so use it... the only way to do anything is becise you can.. live becuse you can and dont apologize for it