Try to take time to think and reflect on yourself.. write down all the behaviors, habits and beliefs that you have which are holding you back from becoming who you want to be and slowly go through each and every thing which had contributed to your situation now... if you need a therapist see one.. it's a process of changing your mindset, unlearning the patterns which are serving you and slowly changing them.. it's a process which needs effort and that's what's called working on yourself.. since each and everyone of us have different beliefs, habits and behaviors that we have to work on which are not serving us to progress.. hope it helps.