I got dumped a while back. It was your typical boy meets girl, girl dumps boy and now boy is questioning his self worth as a human being kinda crisis. This breakup opened a whole new dimension of fuck ups. Fuck ups I wasn't conscious of until recently but these fuck ups were not made by me but my parents. You see, I was raised by an abusive, angry and needy mother. I had to walk on egg shells trying to please her which explains why I try so hard to please every girl in my life. Paps left when I was little and my chance to have a male role model went out the window. Literally I think he snuck out the window one night y'all. My point is my parents fucked up my childhood conditioning so bad I can't function as an adult. How do you change the way your programmed as a Kid? I tried reading self help books trying to be more confident but I learned that when we try to achieve something with the conscious will, the more we are going to fail at it. Especially if that something is purely psychological such as confidence, happiness, self esteem, self respect and all other pillars that make a decent human being. I think I am someone whom you'd call "fara". Alea someone with a limited life experience. I know there is no such thing as a universal change but there has to be something I can do right?
Oct 02, 2020Hello Asker 👋🏾 it is so brave of you to come out here and try to seek for help, well appreciated. I also experienced something similar to you and I recommend you to visit a psychologist (It is very different from a psychiatrist). If you find this hard to do, try to surround yourself with good friends, try to seek refugee in a supernatural power. Apart from that, don't ever think being a "Fara" is a bad thing.
Oct 03, 2020