I think you are too much caught up with other people's opinions. It is okay to want admiration from others. It is okay to long for recognition. But you should know how to handle when you get the opposite: criticism. Some people gives you their wonderful, unbiased criticism. Some just are plainly disrespectful in the way they communicate their opinion. Some people's opinions are just disrespectful and detrimental for you no matter how they are communicated. Some people never fails to say something negative even while you are doing great at something (maybe because of hatred they have towards you or maybe that's just how they are built, idk). ...there tons of ways criticism can be directed towards you like a fucking missile ... If you don't know how to handle them, they gonna blow you up. Know when to internalize someone else's opinion and to think it through. Know when to just ignore a person's comment, like changing the direction of the missile, which is coming towards you. ... but after all, don't get too concerned about what other people say ... yes take it into consideration to some extent ...but there are also messages that you should entirely ignore!! ..for the sake of your own mental health